Friday, June 27, 2014

I Wish I Had Gotten Lost

I lived in London for six beautiful months immediately after my wedding. Adam had already been there eighteen months and had established a beautiful life for himself full of friends and adventures and all the things you wish for when you are in your mid-twenties.

I arrived in the winter, not the best time to see London. But even with the cold and gray hanging in the sky as rain and the occasional bit of snow fell, it was breathtaking. Each step down cobblestone sidewalks and along busy road breathed new life into me. I felt alive in London. I felt as if I were both a part of history and the future in one glorious moment.

I had my routine. After breakfast with my new husband, he’d head off to work while I had a leisurely morning with my Bible, a book, letters to friends, and writing (why, oh why, didn’t I know about blogging back then?!). Then it was off to the gym and the market to pick up the day’s produce (when you have a dorm size fridge in your kitchen you visit the market a lot!). I’d come home, prep dinner, and then relax until he came home. This time I had was so good for my soul.

The weekends were for exploring. We’d hit up tourist spots, see shows, try new restaurants, and just walk through all the different neighborhoods. Sometimes we’d hop on a plane. It was all adventure. I loved it. In London, I found a part of me I didn’t know was there.

I only have one regret from my time in London. I wish I had gotten lost. As much as I loved my days in London while Adam worked, I wish I had left with him one morning. Armed with my tickets and some money, I wish I had boarded the tube and seen where it took me. I wish I had hopped off at an unfamiliar stop and wandered until I found a cup of coffee. I wish I found a new park or garden to walk through. I wish I had made my own adventures.

Someday, many years from now, my girls will leave our home. They will go off to college, or on a gap year, or maybe start working. And what I hope for them is to get themselves lost. I want them to wander and search and explore. I want them to be brave and try new things and see bits of the world through someone else’s eyes. I want them to add to the knowledge and experience they have gained up to that point. I want them to be challenged and tested and come out on the other end true to themselves and true to their Creator.

I want them to laugh and cry and jump up and down with joy. I want them to feel what it is to find the new to them.

I want them to get lost in the story of their lives and in doing so, find themselves.

I started writing this yesterday, and when I woke up and saw what the word was for Five Minute Friday, it felt serendipitous! If you want to write on the word LOST, join in!


  1. Heidi Beyl CogdillJune 27, 2014 at 12:30 PM

    Beautiful post! We want so much for our kids, but nothing is as great as finding oneself...and many times that happens only by getting LOST.

  2. Great photo, great post! I'm from Scotland and I've always enjoyed visits to London. When I went to London to get my US visa, I walked across a part of the city from the embassy to the train station, it was a great adventure and I managed not to get lost ;)

  3. Hi Brenna! loved your post today. Talk about serendipitous - I was just writing about how I was getting lost in London today (or trying to!) So glad you loved our capital city, even in the grey. I agree, getting lost well is an important skill to learn - and one where we really find our roots in God and our confidence too. Thanks for sharing this post!

  4. "I want to get lost in the story of my life, and in doing so find myself." Thank you for your beautiful words shared today.

  5. There is something beautiful about getting lost in beautiful unknowns. My husband and I try to do that when we travel, specially to cities that we visit often. We love discovering new places.

  6. i enjoyed reading this - reminds me not to take life too seriously, to live in the moment, to enjoy the beauty unfolding all around!!