Friday, November 9, 2012

Learning to Dwell - Day 9


The room is quiet, as quiet as it can be in my world. For I still hear the city streets below, and the hum of the laptop, the grinding of the coffee maker, and the chatter of little girls. I steal these minutes and use them for myself. It feels selfish and decadent, but the three ones with the blonde curls and the blue eyes and all the dimples don’t seem to mind as they laugh and play and watch their morning cartoon on my bed. And so I type on, my coffee at my side and my phone nearby as I wait to hear from him.



These gray days have left me with more questions than answers and some days I am not sure what I should be doing. I know there is change coming. My bones ache as they try to grow just a little bigger to hold the goodness that is around the corner. But I don’t know what that change looks like and in this in-between, I don’t know how to carry myself.

I feel manic as one day I rush to accomplish, to prepare for what I don’t know. The next day I feel compelled to keep that chair with the worn, brown leather warm with a book and a cup of sweet coffee.

I want to embrace these quiet moments, but the to do list is ever growing and I have to force myself to do the day's tasks. It's a Momma's job, a job I love and am grateful for.

So I try to find the quiet in me. If I wait for quiet in my surroundings it will never come, of that I'm sure. So as I am walking up the four flights of stairs with piles of laundry, or mopping the kitchen floor, or wiping down the bathroom, or cuddling on the couch watching Tinkerbell, I listen. My often pitiful attempts to listen to what the Creator of all is telling me. I try to find my quiet so I can hear His words.

I hear Him whisper...

DWELL. Dwell in the place you are - the home, the city, the circumstance, the family, this time of life. Learn to DWELL in it all. I might change the circumstances, I might change the surroundings, but I will not change. Learn to DWELL in Me.

And I am so grateful for the quiet.

******

041 - Candlelite and their quick delivery service
042 - Sisters who come by to share some time and wrangle them all to bed
043 - Babes who fall asleep quickly and sleep through the night
044 - Netflix to keep little ones busy while typing
045 - The building confidence that perhaps, after all, all things really will work for good....







6 comments:

  1. Hi Brenna
    I am visiting from Lisa-Jo's and it is nice meeting you and your three bundles of golden curls. I sm from South Africa and we also looooove drinking coffee. It is sort if a holy ritual amongst us!!! I loved your post.
    Blessings
    Mia (http:// hisnlovingembrace.wordpress.com)

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    Replies
    1. Thank you, Mia! I have poured you a cup of coffee for anytime you want to visit! :)

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